What Gets in the Way

Despite my analyst and engineering background I do think of myself as a creative person. But some things gets in the way of me rockin' it out.

• That it wouldn't be right. That I'd do it wrong. 
• That others won't like it or think its stupid or lame. 
• I don't have enough technical knowledge. Maybe I should buy a book or enrol in a course. 
• It might draw attention to myself which generally I dont like. I dont handle compliments at all well.
• I might not finish it to a standard that I like because I get discouraged so easily.  

My brain would like to zoom straight to conscious competence (as opposed to this very uncomfortable conscious incompetence) without breaking a sweat, and to handle it with grace and aplomb. I know its not unusual.  I hear it from so many people in different contexts - "I wish I could bake, It all turns out hard as rocks." Never you mind that I've been baking for over 20 years now with my fair share of disasters. "Wow, you did all the DIY yourself. You're amazing." Well, by myself, with ALOT of help from my friends, not to mention google and youtube. I was absolutely afraid when I knocked all the gib out of my walls, just like I am about this writing gig. I've just became very skilled at using no-more-gaps.

Lets take a moment.

Take a deep breath. And hold, two, three, four.

And exhale, two, three, four.

You're cocooned, warm, safe, and supported.

What colours are you surrounded by?

Pinks and purples? Or greens and blues. Or something else entirely

Breathe in, two, three, four. Hold it, two, three, four.

And exhale, two, three, four.

Thinking of that feeling of safety; that you can relax and simply be.

Is there something there with you?

Breathe in, two, three, four. Hold it, two, three, four.

And exhale, two, three, four.


That there is your imagination at work. Most people keep it boxed up all day, but its always there if you give it a safe place to play.

Feel the fear and do it anyway (R).
Not with the right tools, nor with any preconception that it should be good. Because before I can be good, I first have to start.