Stated Expectations

It was inevitable that my desire to be heard would spill over into the workplace. I wanted to be able to have an open conversation to let people know what I expected in interactions and be able to follow up.

Turns out it just isn't that simple.

I've been working with someone whom we shall call Merida. In the course of her training I've needed to get her up to speed with a software package called Microsoft SQL Server Management Studio. This software allows its users to view database data and is invaluable in troubleshooting pretty much everything. As a data-geek I love that I can see how the data is arranged and build a query to cut it in different shapes. At a more practical level our jobs are dependent on good data, and problems with them happen. Because the problems are not regular you need more insight than other means can give you.

After a period of training early this year and informally saying "you really need this software" I wasn't getting anywhere. So formally (in a specific subject only email) I requested that she get the software installed back in May. There were always reasons - too busy, I've logged a job but IT hasn't got back to me. Oh they tried, but it didnt install, I'll follow up. By July we were preparing to hand my things over to her while I was in Samoa. Again, formally I reminded her - you need to get the software sorted. Meanwhile, whenever she got stuck with data problems I had to dive in to figure out what was going. This was tiresome, not only from a personal disruption perspective but also that she needed to learn how to use the software in order to be able to cover me adequately and was still not even able to get onto it.

She got through the two weeks I was away in August without it. But about a week after I came back something went wrong and she needed me to get data out. By this time I was rather fed up. With the same kind of mentality that I successfully used with my un-motivated flatmate I told her this would be the last time. You need to get this sorted.

By this stage the reason given was that the computer needed to be rebuilt and she needed 3 clear days to sort it out. We've worked together a year and I've never known her to have a "clear day".  I'm a big believer in the Stockdale Paradox - "
You must retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties.

AND at the same time…You must confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be."

The brutal facts were there was not going to be any resolution to the computer issues in the near future to enable the software installation. She needed to pursue a different solution.

Crunch time happened last week when one of the data feeds failed to load data. Again, I was called.  I didn't want to hear from her what I perceived as continued excuses. I cut her pretty short and hung up. I had a quick look at the data and then shoulder-tapped Pooh in the office for the emailed data snapshot. 10 minutes later I  gave her, rather unembellished, what she needed.

What followed was abit of rant or vent at our mutual, ever-tolerant, people manager Mr Peacock. I don't know how to get her to listen? She needs the software. I've been asking her to do it for months. Mr Peacock was of the opinion she needed the three days and (probably) that I was being rather unsympathetic.

While I am keen on gold-plated solutions, given the brutal facts of the situation I was happy to use duct-tape when required. The next morning I went into the ICT area and explained the situation. The Energizer Bunny was there and went into solution mode, suggesting either getting her a second machine or getting her to remote onto one. The latter could be actioned immediately without any delay or cost. We could have done this back in May if needed.

Which should potentially be a happy-ever-after-the-end kinda thing. But no - again my feedback is that I'm "rude and unprofessional". And now we've "got to sort it out".

It is a similar kind of situation to my communication with my unmotivated flatmate. He also had high standards for his proposed solution but to his credit found some duct tape before things really got stressful. Merida, on the other hand, chose to stick her head in the sand and hope for the best.  Worse, from my perspective, she was surprised that it annoyed me and upset that my response was no longer sympathetic and polite.

I don't believe I should be responsible for someone elses IT issues. Nor their unwillingness to address those issues in a timely manner. The softly and politely method was not working to achieve the ultimate goal - Merida skilled up to solve any problem handed to her. I'm attacking my green Avoidance but in doing so am perceived to be attacking someone even more green in Avoidance than myself.

If I extend the Paradox further - I've got to believe that this is all going to turn out alright in the end. I have my fingers crossed for "sorting it out" tomorrow.